I have just engaged in a phone conversation with an old confidant, the director of Campus Ministries at my alma mater Franklin Pierce. He is someone from whom, back when I was a student there, I found both spiritual guidance and mental guidance.

From this conversation, I have drawn the following lessons regarding a recent complication in my personal life:

• I have this terrible tendency to judge myself based on how other people view me.

• I suppose I should never allow myself to become too comfortable and vulnerable

• The onus of a friendship or relationship is not just on me.

• The other person has her own baggage too.

• She couldn’t handle the baggage that I have had to struggle with and I couldn’t handle hers.

• I realize I would have been more careful had I known or trusted her better

• I should have known that the friendship would be likely to end in conflict, as she did not really know me. Conflict might have been avoided if she had been able to see me for who I really am and vice versa.

• Facebook robs us of authentic friendships and relationships.

• Before I discovered Facebook, I was focused on nurturing the small circle of friendships I had. Since I have enlarged that circle exponentially thanks to Facebook, I have been less inclined to nurturing few friendships, preferring to stretch my abilities thin by trying to be friends with everybody.



I hear the sound of Smokey Robinson’s voice crooning inside my head as I write this post…

Oooh...la la la la

I did you wrong, my heart went out to play
But in the game I lost you, what a price to pay
I'm cryin'

Ooh baby baby
Ooh baby baby

Mistakes, I know I've made a few
But I'm only human, you've made mistakes too
Im cryin'

Ooh baby baby
Ooh baby baby

I'm just about at the end of my rope
But I can't stop tryin' I can't give up hope
Cause I feel that one day I'll hold you near
Whisper I still love you
Until the day is here
Oooh, I'm crying

Ooh, baby baby
Ooh, baby baby
Ooh, baby baby
ooooh..........


It works on many levels.

-- Mailman enduring…